HOME :: PUBLICATIONS :: Exclusive: Firing a Shot Across Obama’s Bow, by SATIRE BY SHAWN GOODWIN

Exclusive: Firing a Shot Across Obama’s Bow

by SATIRE BY SHAWN GOODWIN November 21, 2009
One of the most common complaints about President Obama is that he spends more time apologizing for America than standing up for it. The man gives off the impression that America is no better, and in fact, somewhat worse than, the other countries of the world. The term “American exceptionalism” cannot be found in the president’s mental dictionary, because he believes in that about as much as he believes in unicorns, leprechauns, and tax-cutting Democrats. Besides, it is difficult to explain American exceptionalism when you are always face-to-waist with other world leaders, a position Barack Obama found himself in last weekend when he bowed to Japanese Emperor Akihito:
 
Obama on Monday was in China, having wrapped up the Japan leg of his Asia trip two days earlier. But Washington's punditocracy was still weighing whether or not the US president had disgraced his country two days earlier by having taken a deep bow at the waist while meeting Japan’s Emperor Akihito.
 
Calling the calisthenics that President Obama performed, a “deep bow,” is like calling Jessica Simpson “a little dim.” The term just doesn’t even begin to cover it. Most casual observers figured the president was either going to clean Emperor Akihito’s shoes or pick up the shiny penny that must have been on the sidewalk. Of course, considering the vanity of Chairman Bow, he is probably just enjoying his own reflection in the newly-waxed floor. Nevertheless, the event has given comedians weeks of material, and has pundits on both sides of the aisle breaking out the face palm. 
 
Political talk shows have played and replayed the moment from the second day of Obama's week-long Asia tour, which set the blogosphere on fire and chat show tongues wagging.
 
"I don't know why President Obama thought that was appropriate. Maybe he thought it would play well in Japan. But it's not appropriate for an American president to bow to a foreign one," said conservative pundit William Kristol speaking on the Fox News Sunday program, adding that the gesture bespoke a United States that has become weak and overly-deferential under Obama.
 
With all due respect to Mr. Kristol, that statement is incorrect. America passed “overly-deferential” about three exits back. Since January 20, the nation has been boldly going where no one in America has gone before. Welcome to Submissiveville. Population: Us. 
 
You see, the president has a problem understanding protocol, and he has little to no desire to learn. Why else would he fold his hands above his belt during the Pledge of Allegiance? Heck, that is not even Obama’s worst offense. Some anonymous sources (read: Bill Clinton) claim that the president flushes tattered American flags down the toilet, puts on a hat during the National Anthem, and moons the Jefferson Memorial at every opportunity. A story like that has got to be true!
 
Part of this is President Obama’s fault and part of it is not. It is his fault because when he is at a cocktail party with Bill Gates, Stephen Hawking, and the guy who invented “Mr. Microphone,” Barack Obama believes he is the smartest man in the room. So, when some pimply-faced diplomatic geek with an “I (Heart) SecState” tie tells the president that he is not supposed to bow to a foreign leader, Obama ignores him. Global hilarity ensues. On the other hand, it is not his fault because he is so thoroughly unprepared for the job. Community organizing does not usually lend itself to state dinners with political giants, so Obama makes things up as he goes along.   Again, hilarity ensues.
 
To modify a famous movie quote, “Scrawny, arrogant, and stupid is no way to go through life, son.” For all of President Obama’s alleged smarts, the man is just not that bright. He tells the world that America is a bad place filled with bad people, but forgets that his remarks are seen and heard by Americans immediately afterward. He tells America that he is tough on terrorism, and then dishonors the memories of those who died on September 11th by bringing the architect of the attacks to New York City for a civilian trial. He cheats at Scrabble, and then expects to get a triple word score with a made-up word. No one is dumb enough to believe that “ZQAJ” is an acceptable word. The problem arises when Obama believes we are stupid, and sadly, he believes this every waking moment.
 
In the grand scheme of things, President Obama’s bow is pretty small potatoes. However, when combined with his other miscues – including a bow to the king of Saudi Arabia in April – they add up to a big pile of lima beans. Unfortunately for us, our current president treats America like leftovers. 
 
FamilySecurityMatters.org's official satirist, Shawn Goodwin, is a blogger and police detective from Philly. You can visit his blog here.
 

blog comments powered by Disqus

Team Obama: It's awful that in 2012 use of birth control has become controversial

May 16, 2012  09:06 PM

Nice strawman, clearly designed to scare soccer moms by stoking fears about scary religious-right fanatics. In Saudi Arabia, use of birth control might be controversial. Here in the United States, by contrast, the Supreme Court ruled 47 years ago that use of birth control is a constitutional right. There is no serious effort afoot to overturn [...]

MTV bows to Obama on speech conflict

May 16, 2012  08:26 PM

MTV Juggles VMA Telecast to Appease Obama's Fading Youth Vote dlvr.it/1ZYrv4— Breitbart.com Feed (@BreitbartFeed) May 16, 2012 "That's one really tough decision out of the way," said no one. MT @VanityFair: MTV Awards Same Time as Obama Speech vnty.fr/JvN3cc— Gabbi Baker (@gabbibaker) May 16, 2012 Via Deadline Hollywood: MTV does not want to split the [...]

Hey, what's more popular than the Obama budget? Top 15 tweets

May 16, 2012  06:55 PM

Yep, it’s another trending #hashtag to add joy and gigglesnorts to your afternoon. What’s more popular than the Obama budget? Twitter counts the ways. The rest of our top 15: Walmart bras on clearance #MorePopularThanTheObamaBudget— Amanda Bland (@blandinbasement) May 16, 2012 #MorePopularThanTheObamaBudget Gay Pride week in Tehran— The H2 (@TheH2) May 16, 2012 Not passing [...]

Floyd Mayweather speaks out against Manny Pacquiao, supports Obama and gay marriage

May 16, 2012  06:29 PM

It seems like Floyd Mayweather is willing to fight Manny Pacquiao just about anywhere but inside a boxing ring. Unlike Pacman, Money May voiced his support for gay marriage and President Obama through his Twitter account. So it looks like Mayweather now has yet another excuse for dodging Pacquiao. In the past he has blamed [...]

RIP: Mary Kennedy, wife of Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., dies of apparent suicide

May 16, 2012  05:31 PM

Mary Kennedy, estranged wife of Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.  was found dead in her home. She was 52 years old. CNN confirms that Mary Kennedy, wife of Robert F. Kennedy Jr., has been found dead in New York.— Justin Lear (@CNNJustin) May 16, 2012 More Kennedy family tragedy RT @NBCNews: NBC News confirms Mary Kennedy [...]

FSM Archives

  FSM Archive   Search Must Reads
More in PUBLICATIONS ( 1 OF 25 ARTICLES )